Cuff’s fight with Dobbin, and the unexpected issue of that contest, will long be remembered by every man who was educated at Dr. Swishtail’s famous school. The latter Youth was the quietest, the clumsiest, and, as it seemed, the dullest of all Dr. Swishtail’s young gentlemen. His parent was a grocer in the city: and he was admitted into Dr. Swishtail’s academy upon what are called “mutual principles” – that is to say, the expenses of his board and schooling were compensated by his father in goods, not money. A dreadful day it was for young Dobbin when one of the youngsters of the school, saw the cart of Dobbin & Rudge at the Doctor’s door, discharging a cargo.
Young Dobbin had no peace after that. The jokes were frightful, and merciless against him.
“Your father’s only a merchant, Osborne,” Dobbin said in private to the little boy who had brought down the storm upon him. At which the latter replied, “My father’s a gentleman, and keeps his carriage”; and Mr. William Dobbin retreated to a remote outhouse in the playground, where he passed a half-holiday in the bitterest sadness.
High and low, all made fun of him. And he bore everything quite patiently, and was entirely dumb and miserable.
Cuff, on the contrary, was the great chief and dandy of the Swishtail Seminary. He smuggled wine in. He fought the townboys. Ponies used to come for him to ride home on Saturdays. He could knock you off forty Latin verses in an hour. He could make French poetry. What else didn’t he know, or couldn’t he do? They said even the Doctor himself was afraid of him. Cuff, the unquestioned king of the school, ruled over his subjects, and bullied them, with splendid superiority. This one blacked his shoes: that toasted his bread, others would give him balls at cricket during summer afternoons.
“Figs” was the fellow whom he despised most. One day in private, the two young gentlemen had had a difference. Figs, alone in the schoolroom, was sitting over a home letter; when Cuff, entering, bade him go upon some message. “I can’t,” says Dobbin; “I want to finish my letter.”
“You CAN’T?” says Mr. Cuff, laying hold of that document (the poor fellow was writing to his mother, who was fond of him, although she was a grocer’s wife) “You CAN’T?” says Mr. Cuff: “I should like to know why, pray? Can’t you write to old Mother Figs tomorrow?”
“Don’t call names,” Dobbin said, getting off the bench very nervous.
“Well, sir, will you go?” crowed the cock of the school.
“Put down the letter,” Dobbin replied.
“Well, NOW will you go?” says the other.
“No, I won’t. Don’t strike, or I’ll THMASH you,” roared out Dobbin, looking so wicked, that Mr. Cuff paused, turned down his coat sleeves again, put his hands into his pockets, and walked away with a sneer. But he never meddled personally with the grocer’s boy after that.
Some time after this interview, it happened that Mr. Cuff, on a sunshiny afternoon, was in the neighbourhood of poor William Dobbin, who was lying under a tree in the playground.
Well, William Dobbin had for once forgotten the world, and was away with Sindbad the Sailor in the Valley of Diamonds, when shrill cries, as of a little fellow weeping; and looking up, he saw Cuff before him, fighting a little boy.
It was the lad who had peached upon him about the grocer’s cart; but he bore little malice,[9] not at least towards the young and small. There was everyday life before honest William; and a big boy beating a little one without cause. Up he sprang, and screamed out,
“Hold off, Cuff; don’t bully that child any more; or I’ll – ”
“Or you’ll what?” Cuff asked in amazement at this interruption. “Hold out your hand, you little beast.”
“I’ll give you the worst thrashing you ever had in your life,” Dobbin said, in reply to the first part of Cuff’s sentence; and little Osborne, gasping and in tears, looked up with wonder at seeing this amazing champion put up suddenly to defend him: while Cuff’s astonishment was scarcely less.
“After school,” says he, of course; after a pause and a look, as much as to say, “Make your will, and communicate your last wishes to your friends between this time and that.”
“As you please,” Dobbin said. “You must be my bottle holder, Osborne.”
“Well, if you like,” little Osborne replied.
When the hour of battle came, he was almost ashamed to say, “Go it, Figs”; and not a single other boy in the place cried that for the first two or three rounds of this famous combat.